


good eye

by Balthuza



Series: spindleweed and elfroot smoke [11]
Category: Dragon Age (Video Games), Dragon Age - All Media Types, Dragon Age: Inquisition
Genre: Cooking is hard, M/M, Multi
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-08
Updated: 2018-12-08
Packaged: 2019-09-14 04:13:04
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 512
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16905888
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Balthuza/pseuds/Balthuza
Summary: "So, since you are here, would you mind cooking the dinner? It’s all prepared, just throw it in with some water and let it boil for a bit. You’ll be able to cook it no problem."It does not go according to a plan.





	good eye

“You… Are you naked?”

“Good eye, darling.” Dorian leaning out from behind Herbert and raising his brows appreciatively. Var distractedly looked down before drawing his eyes back to the coat in front of him.

“It seems so, doesn’t it?”

“Why are you naked?” tries Herbert again, unable to draw his eyes from following the lines of vallaslin along Var’s skin, but honestly not trying all that much.

He never really had the chance to watch the marks in sunlight.They were pretty. 

“Because it is hot? Also, because my coat starts to smell. I think some pieces of… whatever that thing was got stuck somewhere when it exploded.”

“Oh.” Dorian makes a step back and scrunches his nose.

“Yeah.” Var makes face at the coat. “So, since you are here, would you mind cooking the dinner? It’s all prepared, just throw it in with some water and let it boil for a bit. You’ll be able to cook it no problem.”

“Sure thing. You take care of you, er, problem.”

“Please don’t make me sound like I’m going to masturbate over a smelly coat.”

Herbert runs.

 

~~~

 

It does not go according to a plan.

First, there’s a lot of things in Vars pack’s, and even more food. They pick one that seems to be freshly prepared only to thing some dried fish inside, then some weird fruit in another.

Before they find what they’re looking for, approximately, the water disappeared from the pot and they decide it is easier, and safer, to fill it with pure ice rather than some suspicious river water.

The ice moans in contact with the hot metal before the pot creaks and explodes, sending out pieces of hot metal hurtling through the air like daggers. 

This is when Herbert is ready to accept his issues with cooking, and get Var before they make even bigger mess.

Dorian is not.

Magic, he reasons, can do things beyond understanding of an idiot in some shithole village. An idiot in a shithole village can most likely cook. Therefore it stands to reason that magic can and should, be able to substitute.

Herbert imagines Steven’s face in a fact of such a conviction, sees the fire in Dorians eyes, and accepts his fate.

 

~~~

 

“I’m not going to ask.” decides Var walking through the camp later. The camp looks like a warzone, but after so many cooking sessions with Seph, Var thinks he can tell well enough what happened there.

There’s a piece of metal, dark and misshapen but looking suspiciously like a piece of his pot stuck at least two inches into the stone at his eye level when he reaches the other end where Dorian and Herbert sit huddled over a pot, with the Iron Bull tasting whatever's inside. 

“On the other hand, I just might.” Herbert sighs and Dorian refuses to make eye contact. “Was it ice?” The Iron Bull nodes, and they look at him surprised before he just shrugs. 

“I should’ve known better than to leave mages in the kitchen by themselves. Shame about the pot, tho.”

 


End file.
